My Bishop said a phrase one Sunday… I am more than just a survivor, I am living!!! I started questioning… Am I truly Living? Experiencing life? Just for me. No children… no husband… hmmm. I am still cooking and tending to everyone else, but ME. This thought bothered me. I know I am a homebody, yes, I do things with just my immediate family. Me, being an only child, I did a lot of things on my own. When my mom was sick times got really lonely but, I coped. But when I got sick LONELINESS was an understatement, but again I coped. See, my mom and I had each other, and nothing else really matter until I got married and had my children. I lived life with my mom, we had great experiences and adventures. This all stopped after she got sick. I switched into survival mode and never switched back into living.
I was invited out with friends from high school this weekend. I was excited to go, actually. I got nervous and then scared. I thought of all the reasons why I was scared to go out and have a good time.
I felt like I didn’t accomplish much. I am an artist, but not a famous or well-known one. I am a nurse, but not 
working because I have to be home with my children. I am an entrepreneur. I am working hard to publicize my business and now I am a blogger. I started to see my accomplishments. I started seeing how versatile I am; all the things I have done and trying to get done. I realized my success may not be a specific job or educational but, I accomplished quite a bit… But losing my mom whom, I did everything with I realized I truly put borders up. I don’t drive outside my local area, I don’t hang out or see my other family members. I don’t go to the city for plays, food, museums, and fun. Who am I?
I will not let these experiences that have loosed me from one set of insecurities, lock me into another set of insecurities. I am going to live Full LIFE. I am not going to be caged by anything. Our insecurities can truly cripple us and I am not having it.
I beat CANCER and Thyroid disease. I am not just a survivor, I am LIVING!!!
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Join me in LIVING, once a month I plan on doing something outside of my norm. Survivor mode is useful but, never should be permanent.
I am not just a SURVIVOR, I am LIVING is available at TEoTWBrand
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Another great blog written by a true survior. I’m glad you’ve come to this realization and I can’t wait to see the new journey’s you embark on.
Stay blessed and I wish you Peace, Blessings and Prosperity.
Thank you… I am excited to see where I end up as well…
Peace Blessings and Prosperity to you, too.
Very insightful. This is predicament I have found myself in before.
Thanks you and what steps did you take to work your way out of it?
I love that..”I am living!”. Which is more than just surviving or what I call subsisting! Live each day to the fullest! Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for reading… Love your word subsisting!!!
Having a chronic illness has often left me wondering if I am just surviving or living. I often have to remind myself that living is very important and I have tried to focus on this over the past few months. I am glad that you were able to come to this realization and I wish you the best of luck going forward.
Thank you… I wish you the best of luck as well.
What a great post you shared! Good to learn new. God bless you always!
Thank you reading, Nicole.
I salute you for not only surviving and beating Cancer and Thyroid disease, but living. We all survive. Not enough of us truly live. I wish you the best. You deserve to enjoy life as you see fit and it’s very encouraging that you realized it and are moving to do so. Oh on another note, that is a beautiful painting in the top of your post. I like that!
Thank you… I am happy that you appreciate my art work…
Grief does funny things, doesn’t it? But you have accomplished so much. I support the idea of truly living outside your norm!
Yes, it does. Thank you for your support
Wow you have been through a lot. I admire your ability to get up and keep going. Congrats on beating Breast Cancer!
Thank you